September 07, 2004

I shall NOT drink tap water at all cause!
Five people I know are pregnant.

That's just odd, don't you think? Must be something in the water... I am very happy for every single one of them and certainly looking forward to meeting their rugrats (i know they will all be cute!) but five people all at the same time is just too weird for me! I have talked to three of these women and they have different kinds of complaints about their pregnancies - morning sickness, backaches, mood swings, bathroom stops, etc... but at the same time they are all very happy and cannot wait to deliver their little ones into this world.

And here I am sitting, wondering, why the hell do i not have the urge to have kids?

maybe it's because i'm having too much fun.
maybe it's because i haven't had as much fun as i think i should.
maybe it's because i'm still clumsy.
maybe it's because i'm afraid i'll have ugly babies and people will make fun of it (just like my friends and i cringe when we see ugly babies).
maybe its because i, myself, am still a child, or atleast childish that i don't think i'm capable of bringing up a child.
maybe it's because i still have so much i want to do that it'd be unfair for me, and the baby, if i had one now.
maybe because i have a five year plan for myself, career-wise, and that doesn't involve having a kid.
maybe it's because i'm afraid that the kid won't respect me just like every other kid i see and/or meet disrespect their parents and elders.
maybe it's because there are tons of crazy people in this world that i really don't want to put a kid through dealing with them.
maybe it's because i'm selfish.
maybe its because i have yet to grow up.
maybe its because i dont want one.

for now.

i'm sure i'm forgetting a lot of 'maybes' that should be included on that list. but what i've listed alone is enough reason for me not to have a kid at this point. i think when i'm ready i'll know. so no need to ask me when i'm having one coz, depending on my mood, you'll either get a side kick with an upper cut follow up, or a smile along with 'mind your own business'.

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