April 27, 2003


Magical, Whimsical, Me.
Making Rainbows. The weather has been so nice lately that it has allowed me to get some gardening done. Listen to me. I feel so old. Had it been 5 years ago, I'd be talking about waking up at 4 PM from too much partying the night before. But now, here I am talking about gardening. It's hard work man - but its something I enjoy doing. The bugs didn't even faze me. Not even the worms - and when you're digging and tilling a lawn, you see LOTS of them. Anyway, I was watering the lawn today and I was feeling a bit exhausted but when I saw the rainbows forming within feet in front of me, I smiled. Simple things like that make me smile. I'm a complicated person. But I have simple pleasures in life. Rainbows (specially ones I made), friends calling (specially ones I haven't heard from in awhile), emails from certain people, flowers, my dog, my cats, the smell of lilacs (in my garden), sprinklers, a campfire, stars, moon, the sky... lots of simple things that other people may take for granted.

Richard Gere is sooo dreamy. Just finished watching 'Autumn in New York'. I almost forgot why Richard Gere is still on my list of top 10 sexiest guys. He's old, gray, and yah, old, but it seems that his look never changes and his charm never falters. Anyway, that movie is one of the saddest I've ever seen. I liked it though, except for the ending. But if the ending had been different, I probably would not have liked it as much as I do. Anyway, Winona Ryder's character, Charlotte, has this delightful, captivating, enchanting personality. I don't like Winona Ryder but I loved her in this film. I somewhat wished that I can be like her character, less the Richard Gere factor. Spontaneous, unpredictable, magical.

Actually, thinking back, I think I was all that to one person. Not intending to do so, just being myself, I caught someone's eyes, attention, and heart. I did what I wanted to do. I changed my mind quite often. Yet the spell was not broken. When I enter the room, he'd stop and look. I can be across the seas yet he smells me on his skin. When he closes his eyes he dreams of me. My very voice made him quiver. My every touch made him long for more. I was in that person's mind day and night, night and day. I was an uninvited distraction to his everyday routine - a distraction most welcomed. I smile as I think about all this and wonder if I'm still this magical person.

I think I'm going to ask.

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